The
Artist Formerly Known asSince we moved in July none of my neighbors know that I do stand up comedy. I will keep it that way as long as possible. If they think I leave town every few weekends to sell crack I can deal with that easier than I can if they find out I'm a comic.
Whenever anyone finds out you are a comic they immediately treat
you different and do two very annoying things.
1. They always expect you to be funny.
2. They always want to tell you a joke.
2. They always want to tell you a joke.
(I wonder what they would do if I say I'm a proctologist)
Anyway, I digress.
So I'm talking to my neighbor the other night about to see if the
water was out in the whole neighborhood or just my house. Scary
thought to think it's only your house.
As it turns out it wasn't just my house.
Still, I'm digressing....
He had his backpack leaf blower on and I was saying how I'll have
to get one soon since my back yard is a little mini-forest.
He
proceeds to show me his old leaf blower which is similar to this
one with but the extension is probably twice as long.
Come on folks, an extension about twice as long as this. How small
does your penis has to be. This is only about $30,000 away from
buying a Vette.
Well, since he had a new leaf blower, he asked me if I was
mechanically inclined and if so I could probably get this old limp
one to start.
My mechanical abilities are limited to about knowing what the
difference is between a regular and flat blade screwdriver. If you
ask me to get the 3/8ths wrench you would be lucky if I don't end
up giving you a pair of pliers.
However, I am still male so at this point is a challenge to my man
hood to get this thing to work, after all I am now the new guy on
the block and this is how males in this day and age mark their
territory.
So after about 2 hours on a Saturday which eventually included me
using a pair of vice grips to take out the sparkplug and replacing
the sparkplug with the one in my weedeater and dumping out and
replacing the gas and getting a hernia from spending about an hour
of that time pulling the cord I finally got it to work!
Who da man!!!!