My PhotoThe Artist Formerly Known as
 Eric Kirkland's Newsletter
www.thequestionmarkguy.com

August 2006

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Greetings:
Welcome to my elevent Newsletter! Yep, about a week or so late as usual! (Hey, I didn't even have to change that sentence from last month!)  .Check back to the website occasionally for updated schedules!

There will also be selected entries from my Blog, and updated show schedules.

 

Joke of the Month:

Q.  What does a Polish bride get on her wedding night that's long and hard?

A.  A new last name.

 

From this blog entry.

Note to all guys (and girls) part two.


Note: To all guys (and girls) who wear those cell phone earpieces. If you wear them while you are driving good for you to talk hands free.

However, I usually see people wearing them in the gas station, at the mall, in restaurants, etc.

I know you may think, "Dude, I look so cool and hip with this awesome new high tech gear!"

1. Most of the time I see people with these things on they usually aren't talking to anyone because outside of their little word, they really are not as popular as they think.

2. You don't look cool, you look like a dork.

3. You actually more look like the post below. Everytime I see one of those earsets in someones ear I just want to go up to them and say, "Hello, you must be 7 of 9." (Only the reel geeks will get that reference.)

That gives you something to think about in itself. If someone as geeky as ME thinks you look dorky than you can only imagine how dorky you must really look!

Below is how you look in the eyes of the general public.
















"Hey baby! I'm 7 of 9, want to hook up?"

 

From this blog entry

Handicapped Parking


The other day I'm at the library, because that's the way I roll, and I noticed that the handicapped parking spot had a sign similar to this one.

So I was trying to figure out why the fine is $50 to $300. Are there varying rates of unhandicappedness that I'm not aware of?  If you park in the handicapped spot and get out of your car in running shoes and your sports bra do you get the $300 fine? If you get out of the car and you have a slight limp from the softball game last night then I supposed you get hit with the $50 'it's kind of O.K. ' fine.

Of course if you park in a handicap spot and you aren't handicapped, by taking that spot away from a handicapped person that means by default you are mentally handicapped so maybe it should be O.K. for you to park there. Except I don't know what kind of sticker you would have to have on your car to point out you are mentally handicapped. Maybe it could just be a picture of a guy sitting in front of a TV set watching Jerry Springer.

 

On the Serious Tip:

Men have walked the valleys, and flown the sky
            To search for proof of a miracle,
            Yet I can’t fathom why.

 To find these miracles, is the simplest thing to do,
            Just open your eyes,
            And the miracles will be there for you.

Upcoming Shows
(schedule subject to change, visit my website)

August

Dates Club City For reservations call
17 Bygones Bar and Grill Muncie, IN (765) 281-6960 
29   Huron, OH  
30   St. Ignace, MI  
31   Sault St. Marie, MI  

September

Dates Club City For reservations call
1   Manistique, MI  
2   Muskegon, MI  
14   Tuscarawas, OH  
27   Bluefield, WV  

Recent Comics I've worked with:



Bil Benden, myself and Mark Anthony before the show in Mentor, Ohio. 
Notice the rabbit ears.  We are SOOO mature!

Here is the crowd from Mentor.  We could have just each took one person and set them aside to tell them some jokes but those two folks WAY in the back messed up that plan!
(Actually quite a few folks came up after the show started and it ended up being a fun crowd!)

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Missed the previous Newsletters?

You can view them here.
Newsletter Archives

Movie Reviews:

Monster House

I'm going to have to figure out sooner or later what to do when my son gets to old for these kind of movies.  Right now he is the excuse my wife and I use to go catch some good kid flicks.

I think this movie would have been better served to be released around Halloween.  It would have had a better chance of becoming this years The Nightmare Before Christmas.  Even though I'll bet you a dollar this will come out on DVD right around Halloween.

This movie may be a little scary for the younger kids.  However after the beginning the movie isn't as scary and becomes quite a fun ride.  The characters are quite hilarious and the movie isn't one of those 2 hour jobs you have to keep your kids quiet through.

This is a movie that is one you can take the whole family to and both the kids and adults will enjoy.  However it may be kind of scary for kids under 8 or so.

My recommendation
Go see this movie even if you don't have kids!

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